Come on buuuuuddy...
[AWW] He's coming right at me!
A cold blooded heckin pupper
He's coming right for me!
Maybe Maybe Maybe
My old roommate had a three foot monitor.
Was dating a girl for about a month.
One day while I was at work she asked if she could do some laundry at my house since we had a date that night and she hated her apartments laundry room.
Told her no problem, I'd meet her at my place in a few hours when I got off.
Forgot to mention my roommates free range monitor because he rarely ever came out of the roommates room and I didn't think of it.
45 minutes later I get a phone call from my hysterically shrieking, terrified, girlfriend.
Took me about 2 minutes to understand what she was screaming (30 seconds into the call I almost dialed 911 because she sounded like someone was brutally killing her and I just couldn't understand her).
She was sitting on the couch watching TV when the monitor came out of his room, bolted across my huge living room into the little den in the back towards her and puked up the rat he had eaten right where my girls feet had been moments before she screamed and jumped onto the back of the couch.
I tried to convince her he was harmless, "It's ok babe that's just Bob he won't hurt you." but no way was she buying that shit.
Didn't dare tell her that Bob could easily get up on that couch if he wanted to.
Got home 2 hours later, she was still on the back of the couch with Bob on the floor right in front of her next to his regurgitated lunch.
Picked Bob up, put him back in his room, cleaned up the nasty half digested rat and spent the next half hour consoling my crying freaked out girlfriend.
My bar tab was HUGE that night.