Navigating the world as a clumsy person is a very tricky thing indeed. Each day comes with its own set of dangers and warning signs and unless you’re alert to all of the cautions around you, it’s pretty likely that you’re going to slip up at some point. Really clumsy people get a bad rep and most of the time, it’s not their fault. The world is a dangerous place and if you don’t constantly hurt yourself, you’re doing something very strange indeed.
Glass that claims to be anything but breakable around you is marketing a huge lie. You stopped buying real drinking glasses long ago because, as soon as you got them home, they all burst into a thousand pieces. You’re content with using infant sippy cups for now.
If you’re left with the responsibility of carrying anything anywhere, you know that something will go wrong at some point. You walk with such caution that everyone around you finds it hilarious, but you know if you didn’t, a disaster would happen.
The words “you break it, you buy it” are a little too real for you and if you look around your home, you can list at least 20 items that you bought without really wanting to. You tell yourself they add “character”, but you’re not really fooling anyone.
New phones are a rarity in your household and even if you’ve just unwrapped a phone, it somehow manages to look about 6 months old. You’re so used to reading around the cracks that without them, things just don’t feel right.